a lost astronaut
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since november 2010……. still giving wishes to her old acc. its a need that im used to do for every single night. blocked her new acc. so that i’ll learn to stop relying on her, since she’s not even using fb nowadays. so there’s nothing to be concern about right? if she’s very active on twitter, then she could have contact me thru there. told her countless times that there are many ways to contact me other than these social networks. your sim card isnt the one that is spoiled. you know what i mean. also, adik have the tendency to forget every single thing i told her. you didnt forget any of it right? i know that she’s busy this very important year, thats why i back away as far as i can from her knowing any of my problems.  but im sure i’ll be there whenever she’s in need. im sure there’s alot of guys out there she could rely on. especially this aiman. i know nothing about them but im already depending on them to help her when she’s in need. its really really good to know that she’s happy. with aiman. thanks to him that she’s doing well. and coping well with school, i think. no stress kan dik? i dunno luh. but this are the kind of things that every older brother will feel, her happiness always comes first. so theres nothing for me to worry about, right? been living every single day filled with unanswered questions. how’s atuk condition? i cant stop thinking what really happen to him. how’s ayah health? how’s wardinah? how are you doing with life and school right now? eventho we didnt get to talk anymore, i’ve never forget to pray for your family well being. eventho mine are not in good terms. only Allah knows what to do with them. like i said, i really need to stop relying and waiting for adik’s presence and affection. do you know how it really feels? its really tiresome to keep on putting high hopes on adik. and maybe she does feel the same way too. adik has been my only encouragement and reason for me to still want to live. reason being i dont have all of the affection from my parents since they start…….. neh. i really do feel alone. except for when sometimes im with my brothers, doing stupid stuff. no one really cares. i dun really mind because im not related to any of them so why must they care. all i need is a family. just a plain lovely family. morale support anyone? heh. didnt mean to be ungrateful with what i have. yes i am grateful with what’s left. i just miss the old you. miss talking to you, hearing your voice. miss having your presence near me. miss that old sister. errr yeah……. kay aku bboal mepek. anyway nitenite adik. as usual, hoping that i can fall asleep. fever please go away, its been days already. bsk skolah. taik. nitenite.






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a-love-like-thisss: :)) i love forehead kisses. both giving and receiving.


currently trying to survive days with the fever i’ve been having, plus the 2-3hrs of sleep. then school. trying to be superman. 
  -  29 April 2012